Friday, May 30, 2008

Life of a 23 something girl...

7:00am.
Phone rings. Trrrrrring trrrrrring...
Voice on the other end : Hello beta. How are you?
Asha: I'm good amma. Getting ready to go to office.
Voice on the other end : Oho. Had breakfast ?
Asha: No amma, will have at work.
Voice: Ok. Ride Safely. Btw, we got hold of a "case".
Asha: What case?
Voice: The guy is working in a reputed firm. Earns pretty well too. And he's in the US.
Asha: So?? (I woke up 15 mins before, and this is what I hear first thing in the morning! And yes, btw proposals are referred to as "cases" in Indian families.. lol)
Voice: Well, see beta, you are getting old, and, so are we... (Raam katha started..)
Asha: Ok Need to rush to office.. TTYL.. Bbye

HUNG

10 am:
TRRRINN TRRRINGG
Asha: Hello.
Voice: Hello beta.. So, that case I was talking to you about.. The guy is.. blah blah blah. You see, u ll just need to take a break from ur career and go to US. Forget CAT beta, you can try somethign small there..
Asha: (Burning with rage...) I WILL NOT SACRIFICE MY CAREER..

THUD... Phone down :D

1 pm :
TRRRING TRRRING
Asha: Hello (Sigh..)
Voice: Beta, How are u ?
Asha: I'm good. (Wonder why ppl ask me the same question when they know the answer to it ;))
Voice: So, there s one more "case"...
Asha: having luch will call later.. Bye..
(Sigh !!!)

4 pm:

TRRRRING TRRRING
Asha: Hello (Sigh.. Sigh..)
Voice: So, this guy .. (Gosh, There was no hello.. Straightaway "GUY")
Asha: Mama, pls do whatever you please no... Chill !!

6 pm:
Voice: Hello
Asha: Hello, I am going out for dinner with friends today. Will be the last one, as they re leaving outta town for furthur studies. Will be back home by 10.
Voice: 10 !!!!!! Is that a time when girls return home ? Its not meant for our culture !!! Dont give us tension. If you go out like this we'll not find guys for you!!!
Asha: Ok. Will try to come back soon amma.. Dont worry. Its not always that I go. Its their last day, and probably the last time I am going out with them.
Voice: K. (ANGRY)

THUD


9:30 pm
TRRRING TRRRING
Asha: Hello.
Voice: Reached home?
Asha: Actually, just one round of starters is over, I ll leave after the main course.
Voice: WHAAAATTTT ? U re not yet home?????? Pack up NOW !!! Is this a time for girls to stay out ??? OMG ! Look at how our daughter has grown up...
Asha: Ok. Leaving NOW...

10 pm
Voice: Hello
Asha: Reached home ma.
Voice: Blaj blah blah blah blah.... blah blah blah blah blah... Blah blah blah blah bla.... (You can guess this...)
Asha: Ok, I am just bugged of life !!
Voice: Stop ur studies.. A degree is enough for a gurl.. Time you get married.. NO MORE HIGHER STUDIES... blah blah blah blah blah... blah blah blah blah blah


This is the story of a 23 something in a conservative Indian family. No matter what level of education you're capable of achieving, no matter how capable you are, no matter how high a dream you have, its time you go to that corner of the house called "kitchen", and cook something for your husband, if not, learn to cook some thing for ur future husband. Its time you get married to anyone what so ever, so that your parents can happily sit back and lay the burden off their shoulders. Its time you forget your business dreams, shed that extra weight, stop wearing those baggy jeans and tees, stop partying, and sit at home, to "create" that impression.

In an era, when business decisions are made over a couple of drinks, or, say, a game of golf, and, if, being a woman, you dont drink, nor play a game of golf, is it fair that you lose out on the opportunity of being a part of that decision, when you have the same caliber ? Hmm.. its not necessary that you drink, or play a game of golf, but making your presence felt, and being a part of the business is not that difficult right??

Its just a thought I always have in mind.. Why does life after 20+ suddenly seems biased towards the darker gender? I hope the former generation realizes the need for gender equality, and we get a fair share of everything enjoyed by the darker sex, as, we're equally able, equally hard working, and we have equal rights to indulge in all that they do !

12 comments:

harsha_kn said...

Don't agree ONE bit with the conclusions here. But will reserve my opinions.

Manjunath Singe said...

@"I hope the former generation realizes the need for gender equality......"

i guess things have changed a lot and of course, lot more has to change. May be you should look at conservative Indian families with compassion, rather than condemnation. their opinions are completely based on contemporary social structure and it's quite hard for them to understand the 'constant change' in the society.....
I believe, the recent women's reservation bill is a good example towards gender equality...

Vandana Shenoy said...

Regarding the women's reservation bill, I have a few reservations. I see it as a bias towards women. I would be more happy if women could stand up for their rights on the basis of merit, and not on the basis of reservations. I wish it was that easy to change the mind-set of ppl, but, if that could be done, then everything would be put in place :)

Vishwa said...

aah!! Honestly was irritated a bit initlaly with "case" stuff.... but yeah the end has a strong message. The conclusion and explanation makes this worth reading at the end. I donno u, but yeah I can easily say its ur own routine. Yeah dont worry not all guys want that "impression", at least not me from My girl :D! You write well, keep the flow on!! (I like writers as I do write too)

Vishwa said...

ONe more stuff....!Its not about woman, they rule always....! But they say woman is the enemy of woman!! It needs 2-3 generations more to come out of that situation! I have lot more spiritual aspects about the state or woman in India...! Neways somethin goin on here....!!

Manjunath Singe said...

Correct Vandana, but probably you are looking through an eye of urban woman. If you look at the grass root level (the rural India), the 1/3rd reservation of women in grass root democracy (panchayats) has empowering women in an unprecedented way (73rd and 74th amendments).
Regarding the mindset, well, one need to be pragmatic, its quite unrealistic to think that it can be changed in few years' span, it takes time, especially in the country like our's, may be its possible if all the women thinks the way you do... :) Its possible that reservation could be a big push, thats what all policy makers hopes for....

Vandana Shenoy said...

Exactly, I totally agree with you, that its too easy for me to sit out here, and say, that we can do without reservations, and go without a gender-bias (I consider women's reservation a gender bias too !). But, the point is practicality of this proposition is low. All I wanted to say is that, its unfortunate that a time has come when we need something like "reservation" for upliftment. I always wonder if something can be done to change the mindset of people. I ve always believed, nothing is impossible, so just waiting for the right solution !

Manjunath Singe said...

Will be looking forward for your solution... Go change the lives around ... :)

Puthali said...

he he, so identify with what u wrote there :) you may want to try something which works for me, acting like a kid, well in my case its being a kid, since it comes natural to me... :)
but yea, my parents are so scared as what will happen, how can they get such a kid married... :)

it reminded me of something i wrote long time back - http://mindtrail.blogspot.com/2006/05/its-tough-to-take-on-maids-role-when.html

Anyways nice blog, subscribed into my google reader. Keep writing. :)

Ranjan said...

hmmm, not sure i agree with the complete content out here...i like ur reference to the "darker sex" .... i guess you thought coz' there is a term "fairer sex", you will use "darker sex" ....1st time i have seen this but its funny!

Ranjan said...

hmmm, not sure i agree with the complete content out here...i like ur reference to the "darker sex" .... i guess you thought coz' there is a term "fairer sex", you will use "darker sex" ....1st time i have seen this but its funny!

Vandana Shenoy said...

I was trying to emphasize the term.. I will make the letters bold to create that effect :D